Thursday, February 4, 2010

falling slowly

i have a secret. ive actually had this secret for most of my life until this terrible injury.i couldnt tell anyone because i thought i would jinx it. i wouldnt even let myself feel it because i thought it would make something bad happen. but its about time i let this secret out. my life was perfect. so magnificently and wonderfully perfect. and i was happy. so unbelievably happy, everyday. of course i had normal ups and downs, but as a whole, i was truly happy. hard work and a LOT of sheer luck kept me floating on cloud nine. things happened that i didnt even imagine, but i was always so thankful. ok i know im being vague, so i will share with you all some events from the last 10 years of my life, so you understand the dialogue, though i feel very odd and awkward telling you all this. so i think my peak began my senior year of high school. i was senior class president, voted to homecoming court, was at the top of my class, and graduated with a choice of going to harvard, princeton, or duke on a full ride. it was seriously unreal. everyday i was like 'really? is this really happening to me?! then i went to duke where i had the time of my life (just ask laju, arup, ankur or pretty much anyone at Duke from 03 to 07!) and i graduated summa cum laude and phi beta kappa, whatever those letters mean. then i was off to medical school at duke, which was difficult, but i was absolutely loving every minute. i was on my way to fulfilling my dream! i had come so far, nothing could stop me now, right? i had a wonderful family, Baldeep - my unbelievable boyfriend, amazing friends, good grades, a fabulous apartment, i could keep going, but basically i was on top of the world. but, i knew my perfect, little world couldnt last forever. i knew the luck i had for 23 years was bound to run out. i had a deep, dark feeling something bad would happen. something bad, not at all something terrible, awful, atrocious. i was thinking something along the lines of carrie bradshaw getting mugged and getting her purse and manolos (shoes) stolen! never in my wildest dreams would i ever imagine something like this happening. so i leave you all with a question that i have been going back and forth on, is it a crime to be truly happy?

4 comments:

  1. This is amazing. Hai, you can haz news flash? A big part of the reason life was so perfect was because of your hard work, your positive energy and the relationships YOU work so hard on.

    You can have happiness again, but I promise you - it's going to be different. There's going to be book signings, and release parties in NY and LA, and movie deals and doctor awards and saving lives and hugs and kisses and a wedding and bhangra! (just added that for good measure.)

    Love you.

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  2. rajul said everything PERfectly. you have everything because of your amazing personality and positive attitude toward everything in life. and you are always so modest. wah, so amazing.

    it will come again! i may not know much what will happen in my or any of our lives, but that is one thing that i do know- things will come back around. :) and when they do, it'll be the works!

    love you wifey

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  3. Hi love, Krishna and Rajul said it all! Good things didn't happen to you just because you were lucky - you deserved every ounce of it. You worked and continue to work so hard everyday! You were an amazing friend, that's why you had so many amazing people in your life. Everywhere we went, Starbucks, Target, Downtown, Atlanta... you ran into someone who knew you and adores you!

    Things will be different from now on but remember that you still have all of your experiences, you still have all of your best friends, and you still have your wonderful, beautiful, magnificent personality that will come along for the ride.

    Love you more than the world! (PS - can't wait till 500 days on friday!!)

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